Rest In Peace

Let's not have this blog die like other great things/people in this life, such as:

Steve Rogers, fellow Brooklynite and defender of America, aka Captain America

Poor Captain America was sniped by a henchman of the evil Nazi Red Skull. God Bless America and Nobody Else!

Batman aka Bruce Wayne

Most recently in Final Crisis #6, we saw Batman get sniped by Darkseid's laser beams. Good night, old friend. Good night.

Khan aka Ricardo Montalbon

The greatest Star Trek villain in the greatest Star Trek movie recently passed away. Sweet talk the angels in Heaven with your smooth Latin voice, good sir.

Ana Dualla Adama

Oh Dee, for a second you had me thinking you were the fifth Cylon. Alas, your death will only result in a more white cast in BSG. Let me mourn.

Wearing Pink

Dipset, dipset, who you wanna get wit?!

...and that's real

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Karma's A B*tch

After all these years, OJ Simpson seems to finally be going to prison. I remember all those years ago, when I first saw the low-speed chase on the highways of Los Angeles. I vividly remember being upset because the news was interrupting a Knicks game. Yes, back in the day, I was a huge Knicks fan (when Anthony Mason has words shaved on his head, Ewing created puddles of sweat on the foulline when he was freethrow shooting, and John Starks was the closest person to a white person on the team). Those were the good ol' days.

In those days, the Knicks/Bulls rivalry was real. Almost every Eastern Conference playoffs in the early to mid 90s, it was those two competing against each other. And while Jordan got the best of them, I'll remember the great days of the Knicks playing against the Rockets in the finals. Patrick against Hakim! Clyde the Glide Drexler doing his thing! Yes, those were great times.

And just like OJ, the Knicks have faced better days. Much better days. But of course, all good things come to an end...and if you believe in the cycle of circumstances...well, then...Karma's a bitch!



...and that's real.

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Embarassments to Society: Plaxico Burress

I don't know what it's like to be a professional athlete or an amateur athlete, for that matter, but I do know when something is utterly ridiculous. Take NY Giants wide-receiver, Plaxico Burress.

His man has amongst many of his fuck-ups: spiked a ball during the middle of a play, refusing to play in order to get a pay raise and subsequently getting injured in the process of the hold-out, missing practice, getting suspended and fined, and now shooting himself in the thigh.

Plaxico has admitted that all his mistakes are due to his own actions and there's no one to blame but himself. Yet, he continues to fuck-up. If you know you're a fuck-up and you keep fucking up, then that just makes you an asshole.

Another consideration is: why does an NFL player need to carry a gun when going to the club? Yes, I know people might approach you and try to hassle you in a nightclub. But, honestly, when you're in the NFL, you're larger, stronger, and faster than 90% of the entire world population. His man can leap like a human grasshopper, run like a cheetah and has the reflexes of a cobra. Plus, doesn't he roll with an entourage of equally intimidating people...people who can carry guns and don't have superhuman abilities?

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Tattoos: Cool, Introspective and more commonly Random

I love me some Utz and the Utz chick is adorably cute but definately not cute enough for me to want to wake up next to her every morning. She probably smells like potato chips!

How Do you explain at the parlour that u want bacon on your arm?

GUY WITH UTZ AND BACON: uhhh I wanna get bacon on my forearm man, that would rock!

TATTOO ARTIST: I normally dont do high people but this one is gonna be fucking classic. Fuckin bacon.

GUY WITH UTZ AND BACON: Yeah. I know. I could sure go for some chips the munchies are killing me

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Bruce Lee, the Ping Pong Master

This is the hottest video you'll see all year and quite possibly your entire life.

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Street Fighter: Legend of Chun-Li , why? Please no?

Whats that! That is a picture of Kristen Kruek as Chun-Li in the upcoming street fighter movie called "Street Fighter: Legend of Chun-Li " OMG! Why? I really hope thats a working title. Originally i hoped that their first foray into film would dissuade them {CAPCOM} from ever making another Street Fighter movie but, with the sucess of all the Marvel and DC characters, I cant blame anyone whith a relatively developed and well known fictional/non-fictional character to try and cash in on this trend. "Hint" I'm hoping for a He-man movie. This is wrong on so many levels i will not even bother to state them. Chun-li's thighs!!! Goddamit! By the way Michael Clarke Duncan is supposedly Balrog. How is Krueck, who i do find acttractive don't misplace my displeasure, supposed to kick his ass with her skinny ass, in no way, shape or form Chun-li like, toothpick legs. Arrrgghhhh!!! Fustration overload.

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President of the United States

One step closer to fulfilling the American promise.

...and that's real.

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Unomundo con Stepheno Colberto

This is Stepheno Colberto interviewing general asshole Lou Dobbs

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Porn You Can Watch At Work

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The Political Parties of the Superheroes: The Monarchs

The third installment to our unending series, "The Political Parties of the Superheroes" focuses on our favorite monarchies. And away we go!

Black Panther aka T'Challa of Wakanda - democratic monarchy

Black Panther is the the baddest man walking the Marvel Universe and he has the flyest chick in the game wearing his chain (Storm of the X-Men). BP exercises a hands-off approach to his kingdom of Wakanda except when he needs to step in and regulate. But ultimately, BP is for the people, serves the people, and is accountable to the people. He's anti-imperial/colonial while having amicable ties to the U.S., Atlantis, Latvia, and other nations. He's pretty much the guy everyone likes to have around.

King Namor of Atlantis - traditional monarchy

Probably the queerest looking superhero in the Marvel Universe, Namor is the unstable monarchy that must balance a tyrannical iron fist and a leniency towards his more liberal constituents. Being bi-racial, Namor finds it hard to be accepted by his people and life on the surface. This identity crisis has lead him to be very erratic in behavior as well as made him into a complete asshole. He's basically the Saudi royal family all rolled into one: with his position of supporting underwater terrorists while maintaining friendly ties with those targeted by water-terrorist (namely the United States = the Fantastic Four and the Avengers).

Dr. Doom of Latvia - dictator monarchy

Doom is a peculiar case of monarchy. He ousted the previous dictator who was oppressing the country only to take up the position himself. However, to the Latvian people, Doom is much beloved and praised for raising the standard of living, infusing the economy with trade in the technology sector, and being the Simon Cowell in "Latvian Idol." To other nations, he's a menace and a loose canon. He's Ahmadbinajad and Chavez rolled into a tight metal case. Ironically, Doom has limited human rights in Latvia but is a supporter of Tibetian independence (due to his Tibetian-dominated cabinet).

...and that's real.

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The Political Parties of the Superheroes: The Right

Part 2 of our series, "The Political Parties of the Superheroes," is The Right. Here we examine the political leanings of superheroes who are more "right."

Iron Man aka Tony Starks - neoconservative Republican

Tony Starks is the epitome of the neocon. He's for expansive military development, he's for global "security" as the head of SHIELD, and he's all for staying rich. Add a drinking problem into the mix, and you get a mechanized George Dubya Bush with the brain of Dick Cheney. Furthermore, his experience as a POW and his wealth of Washington experience makes him a great candidate for president.

Green Lantern aka Hal Jordan - moderate Republican

Hal Jordan comes from a military background (jet fighter pilot) and later becomes a intergalactic cop. He knows all about the need for global/galactic security and with his multi-species cop-buddies, Jordan believes in a meritocracy. This means individuals achieve all their success due to their INDIVIDUAL actions and responsibilities and not because of some EVIL social structure/system. Jordan believes in clear-cut rights and wrongs. There are no shades of gray. So if you're poor, then that's because you don't try hard enough or because you're lazy. And if you can't pay your bills then you deserve your "blackest night."

Superman - small time "real American" values conservatism

While Superman is an alien from Krypton, I'm pretty sure he believes in Creationism. Supes grew up in the idealized America: stable family, hard-working farmers, and small-town values. He believes in the American Dream, of hard-work meritocracy, and assimilation. Supes represents the success story of the white immigrant/migrant worker. And by golly, God Bless Him.

...and that's real

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The Political Parties of the Superheroes: The Left

Barack Obama has famously said, "There is no conservative America. There is no liberal America...a Republican American...a Democrat America...a Black America...a white America...there is one America. The United States of America." Well, I'd like to counter that statement with another famous quote from the Wu-Tang Clan, "Fuck that!"

As you all know, I love comic books and politics. So, inspired by comic blogger Dave Campbell's I am going to contribute to the list of political affiliations of our favorite superheroes.

Iron Fist - far left white liberal

Probably just as dangerous as white neoconservatives is the white uberliberal. And no one represents an uberliberal more than billionaire kung fu master, Danny Rand aka The Immortal Iron Fist. Let's check the criteria:
-lived in the ghetto (Harlem): check
-has a Black friend (Luke Cage): check
-has a Black girlfriend (Misty Knight): check
-rich (billionaire): check
-appropriates different cultures (kung fu/Chinese): check

Hulk aka Dr. Bruce Banner - Anarchist

The Hulk is so far left that he's not even a filthy Marxist, he's a destructive ANARCHIST!!! He doesn't believe in the structures of any society and wants to be left alone. While he desires a hands-off political state, the Hulk takes it to the extreme due to his personal vendetta against the military and the government.

Magneto & Professor Xavier - anti-imperial/anti-colonial/revolutionary internationalism

While Magneto/Xavier have been analogized to Malcolm X/MLK, Jr., it should be noted that both duals, respectively, fought for the same goals. And both are just as radical as the other. Ultimately, their goals are anti (human) imperialism akin to Franz Fanon, Che Guevara, and Aime Cesaire.
Continue to fight the good fight, my friends.

...and that's real

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The Original Barack Obama Endorses Barack Obama v2.0

Recently, retired general and former Secretary of State, Colin Powell, publicly endorsedBarack Obama. While this endorsement might come a bit late, it perfectly accentuates how much better 'bama is than McCain.

Colin Powell is the original Barack Obama. He's the only member of Dubya's first-term administration to come out unscathed by scandal, corruption, and the ire of the American public. Over a decade after the Persian Gulf War, Powell still remains the soul and conscience of the Republican Party. And believe me, if you're the soul/conscience of a morally deficient party, you're basically alone, alienated, and unheard by most of your colleagues.

If Barack Obama manages to garner the support of all the popular Black Americans who are loved by white people (i.e. Bryant Gumbel, Wayne Brady, Will Smith, etc.), he'll be set.

and that's real

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Baby Mama "Cronicles", cont'd

All I have to say is YAY!!!! I think this is the real black revolution

FIRST barack, and he is still alive

THEN nick cannon, still no logical explainations for that one. I say Roswell has somthing to do with it.

NOW super breeders, their baby will be captain black america!!!

Common gets my vote fall back will and jada. F you B and Jay.

Common Top 5 "niggas" alive!!

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But He's an Arab

Kudos to McCain for trying to squash it, he grabbed the mic quick, but it took him long enough. As for Palin, I'm sure she has a clan membership.

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McCain Calls Obama "A Nee-ga!"

Unfortunately, "that one" in Mandarin is "nee-ga."



So, Johnny Mac basically called Obama a "nee-ga." And that's real.

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Keith Olbermann - Special Comment (Re: Our Economy and Palin)

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Canibus, Big Pun, DMX, Mos Def, Mic Geronimo, John Forte hold a meeting

Classic, includes cypher.

pt. 1

pt. 2

pt. 3


pt. 4

pt. 5

pt. 6

pt. 7

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FBZ WEAR! Ok,were not rappers...so just beta testing tees

This is just two of the designs i've been working on during my hiatus, i'm really considering printing a few but price,quality and control are a big issues when doing this BS. The tee above i did along time ago in photoshop when I first heard the slogan (props to who coined it) its called "we stand for FBZ BKLYN" the text on the back under the what i've decided to be the standard tag says "forever brooklyn..." It runs a mere $22. Theres a version in hebrew, no lie! I'll put it up eventually its called "we stand for FBZ King David"

Anyway this is the latest compromise on my vision, it turned out not too bad. Its called "The Telemundo."Tell me what you think. Visually there are some kinks for me, I just cant put my finger on what they are though. Considering printing this one but i need a couple other of you guys to be down too. !t runs about $24 -$27 depending on how many I order.

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Team of Mavericks

After watching the VP debates, Sarah Palin said perhaps the most awesome thing that will convince me to vote for her and McCain: TEAM OF MAVERICKS!!! Yes, that's right. The McCain/Palin regime will have not just one maverick but a FUCKING TEAM of them. Here's a list of mavericks that I hope make it onto the team:

1. Tom Cruise

Top Gun was fuckin' awesome. And Tom Cruise in Top Gun was fuckin' awesome. The current Cruise is not in any respect awesome. That's why, we will need to pull his character out of the movie and place him on the McCain team. First, we need to invent a reality-altering fiction manipulation machine.

2. Maverick

Who the fuck is this guy? From the X-Men comics, Maverick is a close-friend with Wolverine. And we all know that Wolverine is a motherfuckin' badass. So, logically, Maverick is a badass by proximity. Just look at him. He's got a metal arm and a huge machine gun. He's what Sarah Palin calls the Special Needs NRA maverick conservative!!!

3. Mel Gibson

Motherfuckin' Mad Max! In recent years, Gibson has accused Jews of killing Jesus, been arrested for DUI, and went on vacation with Lindsay Lohan. If that doesn't reek of MAVERICKism, then just call me a fuckin' GOOK!

4. Dallas

The best component of McCain's team of mavericks is the entire Dallas Maverick basketball team. That's right. The whole fuckin' team comprises the McCain Cabinet. Take that Obama. What basketball team will you have in your administration? None!

...and that's real.

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Cornel on Colbert

"the rhyme and syncopation is a species of historical memory of a people who ran with the system now but didn't in an economic system of greed, a culture of indifference towards the weak, and the politics of fear that justify it."

"that free market fundamentalism is just as vicious as religious fundamentalism."

Word. Don't hurt 'em too much, Dr. West.

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Biden Gettin' In That Ass/ McCain Lookin' An Ass

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OG Brother Malcolm

"FBI agents visit to the office of Malcolm X after his suspension from the NOI, with the intent of coercing him to provide information about his Black Muslim group. Employing one of the FBI's own covert tactics, Malcolm secretly recorded the conversation with a tape recorder hidden under his couch."

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The Story of McAbel, Lost Brother of McCain

In the beginning there was Man and Woman...and it was good.
Then came two brothers...and it was good.
Until jealousy and partisonship ripped them apart...and it was bad.

One day in the Garden of Arizona, the great Republican god appeared as a burning Dubya bush before the one called McCain.

The burning Dubya bush said, "McCAIN!!! I am the one god of your father and your fathers' fathers. I am a Republican and I can be merciful and I can be angry. I have given given the Iraqis freedom but I have also ripped them apart in sectarian violence! I helped rich white men stay in power and I have also kept brown people down! McCAIN!!! I shall grant upon you great powers and responsibilities! What shall you say?"

Shocked and awed at the presence of his divine presence, McCain barely mustered up his reply, "Yes, ol' powerful and generous lord."

Pleased, the Republican lord asked, "Where is your brother, McAbel?"
And McCain responded, "Lord, am I my brother's keeper?"
"Indeed, you are not. For your brother is a Democrat and a liberal. He seeks to destroy all that I've built. He seeks to remove the forced freedom I have placed upon the Iraqis. He seeks to give human rights to prisoners. You must stop him, my faithful servant."

As the powerful and beneficient lord spoke to good McCain, a dark and evil presence slithered into the presence of McAbel, the brother of honorable McCain.

the evil black serpent (see below)

"McAbel, are you lost? You have wandered far from your garden. Can I help you find your way back home?" hissed the black serpent. His forked tongue flicking in and out of his dark menacing black mouth.
"Well, kind snake, I am trying to gather some food for my brother," said McAbel.
Eloquently and intelligently, the dark serpent convinced McAbel how to think through situations, to talk to his friends as well as his enemies, and to infuse a sense of hope to those dejected.
"Now, go on McAbel. Find your brother and tell him what I have taught you," cackled the charming black wyrm.

And when the two brothers met...it was bad.

good McCain, foot soldier of the Republican god (see left)
gullible McAbel, the fool of the black serpent (see right)















McCain: "I have come to destroy you, brother. You have been corrupted by the dirt-colored serpent."

McAbel: "Hello brother, I bring you Hope, Progress, and Change. Will you sit down with me and converse?"

McCain: "Your evil liberalism will destroy this great nation! DIE, you gook-loving fool!!!"


And thus, McCain used his experience as a prisoner of war (POW) to torture McAbel. McCain removed the eye of McAbel and ate it in front of his brother.













McCain: "Mmmm...your eye was delicious. I learned that torture method from a gook named Chin Pho Wong Lee. I have maimed you. But, I am not done. I will kill you by running you over with my straight-talk express!!!"

McAbel: "Why brother? What have I done to deserve this? I just wanted a better America for everyone."

McCain: "Your death is one step in making America better."

And as swift as a Vietcong-Communist-Islamofascist-terrorist, McCain ripped the testicles off of McAbel with his bare teeth. Bleeding profusely, McAbel died a slow and agonizing death...one deserving to a hippie-Marxist liberal. And as the sun set, the nation slept safely and happily as McCain spread his message of the Republican god...and it was good.


...and it was good.

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A Moment of Zen

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The Women of Disney

Jessica Rabbit (above) loves the rabbit genital

So, which Disney women would I like to date? Here's a list from the bottom to the top:

5. Ariel the Little Mermaid:
What's not to love about this fine ginger-lass? She's comfortable being half-naked, has a gay best friend named Flounder, and has a magic Negro crab named Sebastian (this means that she's not so racist because she has at least one Black friend). One of the downers about Ariel is that she has no vagina. Yes, that's right: NO VAGINA; just a fish tail. Now, I like to think I'm pretty progressive but getting a tail-job for the rest of my life doesn't sound too appealing. But, the one flaw that makes me not like Ariel is that she's a self-hating mermaid who seeks the affections of the land-loving humans. Any person of color knows this situation too well. She's willing to give up her heritage for more human (i.e. white) acceptance. Stupid, stupid girl.

4. Snow White:
Snow White is eh. Look at her, she's cute but she's not smoking hot like the other Disney characters. Although, she is finer than Mulan because if you can fool an army into thinking that you're a man, then you must kind of like this:
or










But, I digress. I wouldn't date Snow White because she has a history with those seven dwarves. Now, I know every girl has a past before she meets you but seriously, could you handle the fact that she used to get it on with seven dwarves? One lonely night, a drunken/drugged filled night from Dopey's stash, and Grumpy's constant sexual advances will result in a abhorred dwarf orgy.

3. Cinderella:
Cindy is alright in my book. She's blond hair and blue eyed. Plus, she came from a poor, abused household. That only means one thing: LOW SELF-ESTEEM!!! And when you meet a fine ass white girl with low self-esteem you basically hit the jackpot. Cindy has daddy-issues since her pops left her when she was young. That means, she'll attach herself to any man who gives her any sort of attention. Along with the self-esteem thing, she won't leave you because she has abandonment problems. All this adds up to one great semen depository.








2. Belle
Belle is pretty great. She came from poverty but looks like she has good hygiene despite the lack of washing facilities. She also has a sweet voice and does not seem to be creeped out by talking inanimate objects. This means she's either very understanding or a hallucinating schizophrenic. Either way, she looks beyond the physical appearances and sees the goodness in a person. And honestly, that's what you want to find in a good woman.

1. Princess Jasmine
Princess Jasmine is the best, most attractive, and most lovely Disney character. It doesn't hurt that she's also a woman of color. And her bourgie upbringing hasn't spoiled her. She's willing to date a poor boy from the ghetto of Agrabah. She's also pretty understanding, like Belle, in that her boyfriend has a magical blue genie and a filthy monkey as best friends. Unlike the other Disney women of color: Esmeralda who likes white French men and Mulan who looks like a man, Jasmine loves the men of color. And what kind of men? THE CHINESE!!! Yes, Aladdin is of the slanted eye persuasion. Finally, us finally hit the jackpot! It also doesn't hurt Aladdin that he has the sweetest ride in the entire kingdom: a fuckin' flying carpet.


...and that's real.

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Ice-T Was Right

and here's an actual good video by Marco Polo ft. Masta Ace entitled "Nostalgia"

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Me and James Hong

I met James Hong this Saturday during the Chinatown Remembered: Oral History Project screening. One of my short life-history documentaries of Dr. Rubie Ling Louie was shown during this screening at the David Henry Hwang Theater. It's was nothing big and it sounds much better than it actually was.

Here's me during the event: I was very nervous so I stared at the ground.
The guy on the left side of the picture is actually Chinese; the other guy with glasses to my right is from Hong Kong, the female to his right loves white men!

If you don't know who is James Hong, click the link The Man With A Thousand Faces

Well, after meeting James Hong, I've concluded that I want to meet other Asian American actors who are relatively obscure and simultaneously ubiquitous in movies (the "Oh Yea, That's That Dude" actor) like:

Cary-Hiriyuki Takagawa: best known for his role as Shang Tsung in Mortal Kombat
Al Leong: best known for his roles as random Triad, Yazuka, thug, ninja, and/or samurai member in any action film that involves Asians.
and of course, there's Ric Young: best known for his role as the head Triad boss, the Chinese general, the sleazy Asian businessman, and any other high ranking Asian person




...and that's real.

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Put It In Your Mouth

I love Battlestar Galactica.
I love Grace Park.
I love Sunkist.

...and that's real.

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Weezy F Jay Z...

I saw this and thought it was hilarious. I seen this guy do Jay before and Luda and he was on point too. Check freeway in the end..lol. Aww man must be great when people give a shit about you enough to do crap like this.

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Do my ladies run it?...apparently

Peep Bleek in his new gig... getting that shampoo money! I dunno if to laugh or congratulate him, hes been MIA for quite some time.

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Ummm...

Best video concept evar? NSFW

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For the Kids

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Headline News: HUSSEIN MORE AMERICAN THAN MCCAIN

Not an American

Is an American

This is a bit old but still great. It seems potential Negro Presidential candidate, Barack HUSSEIN Obama, who was raised in the American colony of Hawai'i, has an African/Kenyan father, an Asian American sister, and lived four years in Indonesia is more AMERICAN than good ol' Vietnam War veteran, super-rich, cancer-ridden John McCain. It turns out that John McCain isn't even a natural-born American citizen, which is a requirement to become President of the United States.

check out the article:
McCain is a McCan't

If immigrant McCain succeeds in his quest for presidential dominance then this will lead to others who believe they too can become el capitaine!!!

I present to you, my Governator!!!

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Luda'tics

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